Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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