I murdered the dance floor call the cops
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.