Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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