Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize