The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize