She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
