do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize