She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
