babies were throwing up all over the place
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I love having hate sex.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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