Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize