The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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