my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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