i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize