it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
