i barfeds in our rink
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
