You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
