new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize