If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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