one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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