Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
May the power of my ass compel you!!
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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