I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
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