Texts From Last Night

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  (718): View more from New York

  I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn

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  (718): I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn http://tfl.nu/ymp4
  Replies (19) Good night (791) Bad night (2337)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.

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  (812): Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward. http://tfl.nu/8jbn
  Replies (16) Good night (3509) Bad night (794)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?

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  (772): What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous? http://tfl.nu/ray0
  Replies (14) Good night (1196) Bad night (2586)
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  (845): View more from New York

  felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter

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  (845): felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter http://tfl.nu/o0yy
  Replies (33) Good night (1461) Bad night (6344)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.

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  (630): The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind. http://tfl.nu/avf5
  Replies (6) Good night (3962) Bad night (893)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  she used her one phone call to ask me about my day

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  (712): she used her one phone call to ask me about my day http://tfl.nu/55gn
  Replies (19) Good night (4957) Bad night (1214)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.

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  (904): Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again. http://tfl.nu/hcx3
  Replies (1) Good night (798) Bad night (1710)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.

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  (917): After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment. http://tfl.nu/hjie
  Replies (7) Good night (794) Bad night (1586)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.

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  (254): By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook. http://tfl.nu/9v3n
  Replies (8) Good night (1984) Bad night (544)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer

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  (724): you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer http://tfl.nu/1l7a
  Replies (4) Good night (2121) Bad night (494)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.

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  (904): Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel. http://tfl.nu/cy7e
  Replies (18) Good night (1247) Bad night (571)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee

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  (812): Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee http://tfl.nu/tqb3
  Replies (3) Good night (628) Bad night (394)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority

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  (856): He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority http://tfl.nu/8eu2
  Replies (3) Good night (1339) Bad night (355)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby

  (1+61): View more from

  Yah. Thai people are way too trusting

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  (+61): It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby (1+61): Yah. Thai people are way too trusting http://tfl.nu/j4hl
  Replies (1) Good night (699) Bad night (409)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style

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  (586): If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style http://tfl.nu/h4ek
  Replies (4) Good night (510) Bad night (238)

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