I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize