Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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