Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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