I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
