i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize