she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
