stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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