a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
