Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
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Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
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I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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