i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
