Already got asked if we're dating
4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
