I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
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