So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
