I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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