She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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