Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
