Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Houston, we have a blender
Found your dick twin last night
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
