there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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