I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize