i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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