Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I licked your asshole in confidence.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
