Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Your penis caused this!
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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