Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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