Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.

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  (203): I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you. http://tfl.nu/ig1m
  Replies (8) Good night (1502) Bad night (685)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  Awesome. Ask her out.

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.

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  (224): Awesome. Ask her out. (815): Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her. http://tfl.nu/pquv
  Replies (14) Good night (612) Bad night (1691)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.

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  (225): This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season. http://tfl.nu/y1m7
  Replies (20) Good night (680) Bad night (5153)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome

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  (740): My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome http://tfl.nu/ktp3
  Replies (27) Good night (3525) Bad night (1087)
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  (209): View more from California

  I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life

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  (209): I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life http://tfl.nu/mnvk
  Replies (11) Good night (5226) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.

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  (313): I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays. http://tfl.nu/hsxj
  Replies (12) Good night (861) Bad night (3778)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it

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  (816): Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it http://tfl.nu/hlut
  Replies (65) Good night (5207) Bad night (1916)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.

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  (507): I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER. http://tfl.nu/g7c4
  Replies (20) Good night (5530) Bad night (1363)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..

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  (541): just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony.. http://tfl.nu/riwy
  Replies (5) Good night (4759) Bad night (1107)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit

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  (515): Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit http://tfl.nu/4m5n
  Replies (4) Good night (703) Bad night (2244)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."

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  (423): You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING." http://tfl.nu/28kd
  Replies (5) Good night (2712) Bad night (1357)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...

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  (765): We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often... http://tfl.nu/m3tb
  Replies (4) Good night (1999) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.

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  (360): I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box. http://tfl.nu/hoaw
  Replies (2) Good night (1163) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  How drunk is she?

  (1-612): View more from Minnesota

  She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her

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  (612): How drunk is she? (1-612): She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her http://tfl.nu/dk7m
  Replies (1) Good night (599) Bad night (269)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!

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  (562): Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home! http://tfl.nu/3ska
  Replies (2) Good night (405) Bad night (179)

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