dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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