tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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