is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
