i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize