he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
